Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde

I took my dog to the vet today. I have two dogs. Instead of taking them both at the same time - because that would be more pain than I want at any one time - I take them separately. I may change my thinking on that one.

The first one to go is Satan (Mr. Hyde). Her name is really Cocoa - when she is Dr. Jekyl. She is my chihuahua/daschund mix. I call her my trailer park chihuahua because she has this horrible underbite, crooked teeth, a nick in her ear, and a tattoo. I also suspect she has been in a bar fight or two.

We enjoy a lovely ride in the car. We arrive uneventfully and are greeted at the door by the vet's staff. They see us coming and open the door for us. I think that I need a doctor like this myself. Once inside she cowers because she is unsure what to do. She has no idea where we are, who these people are, or what I am doing here with her - and without Beeno.

We are directed to room 2. All is well.

I have to add an aside. I got Cocoa from a family in North Carolina. They were going to take her to the humane society because she is Satan. I thought they horribly exaggerated until I got her in my own house, but I digress. They did tell me that she needs to be muzzled when she is taken to the vet. I thought, nah. That's crazy.

She was sweet on the vet's table and nice to the staff. When the male vet came in she didn't attack. She normally doesn't like men. Suffice to say that lasted about 10 seconds. Then the can of crazy opened. She turned from mild mannered, slightly skittish Dr. Jekyl to Mr. Hyde that would make most cringe. I even got a bit of the teeth. She snarled and growled and lunged herself at me, the vet, and 3 of his assistants. When they tried to muzzle her she got worse. I tried to muzzle her to no avail. Then one tried to restrain her while another put the muzzle on. Didn't work. Two held her down while they tried to muzzle her. At this point she pissed and pooped all over the table. Not pretty.

They suggested I leave the room thinking that might make things better. For 15 minutes I sat in the waiting room as I heard them trying to speak to her calmly as they tried everything to muzzle the beast. One of the assistant's came out because Cocoa had gotten her on the thumb.

FINALLY they put a blanket over her and were able to restrain her long enough to clip her claws and give her a distemper shot. I have no idea if they were able to take blood for tests.

I apologized as if I had some ill-tempered child throwing a tantrum. They told me that isn't the worst they've seen (god help the vet and his staff if there is worse than this). They said small dogs do this when they are threatened or feel threatened. Good lord.

This afternoon I will return with Beeno - my shepherd/retriever mix. It will be a bit of night and day for them. He is frightened of the scale, frightened of the vet, frightened of the entire ordeal. But he will snuggle into me as he does while they take blood, trim his claws, and give him his shot. I don't think he will pee on them, but who knows.

He is also considered a senior citizen. My poor dog is old. He's only about 8! I shudder to think that he is getting older because he still acts the way he did when I got him at about 1. I hope that all his tests come back normal and that he ages gracefully and that he lives to a ripe old age. That, I suspect, is more for my benefit than his.

Dogs are an amazing part of your life. They serve to enhance your life. They provide unconditional love. They protect you no matter what. It's wonderful. Just seeing the wagging tail, the tongue sticking out, the jumping up and down. It's awesome. It's a great way to be greeted when you get home - even though it happens if you just step out to take out the garbage!

Wild Mountain Organics has nothing for dogs - yet. Keep your eyes open, though. Both owners are avid dog lovers. Perhaps we will have an organic/natural doggie shampoo/conditioner. You never know.

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