You know you are old when people really piss you off. I mean, REALLY piss you off.
Normally, I wouldn't be bothered by little high school students creating a ruckus in the hallway of my hotel, but I am getting older and they are getting younger, and I am pissed off.
I flew to Orlando to visit a friend of mine. She turns 30 tomorrow so we thought she would love to hang out with the family Hoffmann. Who wouldn't?
Since we were in Orlando, we did the obligatory Disney and Universal Studios tours. Strollers should be banned (even though my sister had one for her two kids). Bastards don't know how to operate them. If your lazy ass kids can't walk, damn them. And stay home.
If they whine because they can't get every damn character toy, slap them. And then stay the hell home.
If you feel the need to chat with me in lines for rides, shut up and talk to your wife/girlfriend/husband/boyfriend/child. I don't give a flying rat's ass.
And if you are in the room across the hall from me in the hotel, you better shut your damn ass up, hang out with friends in some other room, and stop slamming the door! I remember partying in hotel rooms. I found the room that had the people and I stayed there. What on earth do you need to keep running from room to room for? Did you forget something? Then you are too dumb to warrant to going on a school sanctioned field trip like this.
I do love the drama. Everything is so full of drama. Hey John, I'm getting Buffalo wings. Want any? Hey Mike, what are you doing? Get the hell down here. In fact, I had to call the hotel desk twice in the middle of the night. Tonight won't be nearly as pretty. The can of whoop ass will be opened and these poor, unsuspecting teenagers won't know what hit them. Hell, I'm a college professor. High school students are like dealing with mosquitoes - annoying, but managable.
What I find hard to believe (among many things) is that people allow their high school aged children to go on an overnight trip to Orlando. Um, we went to the zoo! It took the whole day. We didn't take an overnight trip to anywhere. A year or so ago when the girl went missing in Aruba, I thought - Aruba? Who takes a senior trip to Aruba? Are you kidding? While the story is tragic, Aruba? What?
And chaperones. I have no idea where they are. These kids could have drugs, booze, women, men in their rooms and no one would know. I do know they have Buffalo wings. Buffalo wings lead to all kinds of other things like crack and prostitution. It's inevitable.
So I will try to sleep tonight and try not to go postal on any of these ingrates. We will see. My next blog may be written from jail.