Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Holidays for Hallmark

First of all - GO SABRES! Woo Hoo!

Thank you for the thorough spanking of the Flyers! AGAIN!

On to business.

I bought a birthday card for my brother a day or so ago. His birthday was Monday. While shopping, I look for upcoming holidays that are advertised and may require that I buy a card. For instance, Mother's Day is coming. I will need a card. But I have a week or so. It can wait.

Thank God card purveyors announce and advertise upcoming holidays. I may never know when I need to buy cards otherwise. However, I noticed a couple holidays that were missing and that would warrant cards.

Driving to work, I noticed a church sign announcing May 7 as 10 Commandments Day. I didn't see a card in my card store. I have several friends who may like to get a 10 Commandments Day card. Hell, I'd like one that actually listed them. I don't really know them - I know the gist of them. Is "Thou Shalt Not Be a Giant Ho" a commandment? I don't know. I hope not. Or straight to hell for me!

Another holiday coming up (pun intended) is National Orgasm Day - May 9. What that means to me is Woo Hoo! A day to celebrate ecstasy! A day to stay in bed, or on the couch, or backyard, or dining room table, et. al. What would that card look like? I have many ideas, all of which border on porn. But hey, Hallmark - you need to catch up! Let's go! You have all these other stupid holidays like Friends Day, Grandparents Day, Sweetest Day, Lick Balls Day (or is that National Orgasm Day?). Come on.

We don't need all the holidays you purport we do. Let's celebrate holidays that would be worthwhile.


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Michael said...

Just 'blundered' in while trying to locate another kayaking blog. I love your sense of fun! Who knows, Hallmark may too... LOL


... and come visit my blog!

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