Sunday, October 26, 2008

Can't I get a Health Break?

I enjoy reading articles and tidbits about what you can do to improve your health. I particularly like reading about things you have no control over, like genetics. If you are predisposed to cancer, for instance, you are likely to get it. Education allows us to recognize the signs and symptoms to prevent catastrophe, but you will likely get it.

Sure, eat better and exercise and you might avoid it. Might.

That's not to say that I am advocating that we eat like crap and sit on our lazy asses. Quite the contrary. I think that every bit helps so have at it. But enjoy yourself. What good does it do if you live longer only to eat rice cakes for another year.

And no matter what anyone says, rice cakes taste like a horse's ass.

I found an article that I had to share with my sister. The two of us have similar chacteristics, as would be expected. We are both tall, both have blue eyes, and neither of us has an ass.

Imagine my surprise when I found out that those people under 5'5" have a lower risk of heart disease. Those people with brown eyes have less of a chance of developing melanoma (a disease our father died of - and he had brown eyes - hmmm, studies suck). Those people with junk in the trunk have decreased risk of diabetes.

So we laughed. We are at greater risk of heart disease, diabetes and melanoma because we are tall, have blue eyes, and don't have JLo's ass.

In fact, the older we get - if looking at our mother is any indication - the more concave our ass becomes. So instead of having no ass, we end up with negative ass.

I have no idea what medical condition that precludes us for.

1 comment:

Silbs said...

A fun read. Bad science :)